Monday, 9 July 2012

"There I Was", 5110 Days Later

I realize that it is hard to believe but, some people still think I just came off a slow boat from nowhere and know little or nothing about anything. As far as "formal" education, they are right but I was an honour graduate from two schools some in government have never heard about. The first is the school of hard knocks and street smarts.The other was from KISS institute. KISS stands for " Keep it Simple Stupid".

Keeping these facts in mind, there I was sitting just minding my own when I received a letter that was real fancy. The person who wrote this literary masterpiece, had sadly missed a few small but significant points. I wrote a letter earlier to this person's office and explained my simple problem. Kind of like, where is Waldo? My question was a simple one, like me, I asked, "where did all my paperwork go?"

The kind people at the government who wrote up this fancy document, were happy to have me sign it and go on my way. They were so nice that they said that they would keep it for me just in case I needed it in the future. Well to my surprise, I did need all that paperwork back that they so kindly said they would keep for me. When I asked for it, the nice person who writes on fancy paper said that your papers have been destroyed (2 year rule).

I wrote back to the nice person with the fancy paper and said; they told me I could use my papers in the future if I needed them. They never told me that they were just going to get rid of them. These papers had significance to me especially the real fancy one from the Queen. I was saddened by these developments. I thought that the person who writes on fancy paper had missed some things and I was happy to point them out.

I wrote that, you government guys wrote up this real fancy paper for me to sign. It was on behalf of the Queen ya know. Everything looked okay to me so, I signed it and they signed it and we were all supposed to be friends again. Within the Queens paper that they wrote for me it said, (with absolutely no time limits), that I could have all my papers back if I needed them. The person who writes on the fancy paper said (I'm pretty sure) that the Queen doesn't like too much clutter around so if she doesn't talk to you for let's say 2 years, then she just throws your fancy stuff out. They did this and didn't even ask me if I minded. I did mind.

So as a re-cap for the slow ones like me: The Queens people at DND did up some real fancy paperwork for me to sign. This was based on us not getting along and that they wanted to get along. They said they would keep all the papers for me so I did not lose them. I think that the Queen person might be upset because even after they said they would keep all my papers for me it seems they didn't. I wonder why?

I wrote back to the person who writes on fancy paper and asked some real simple questions. They require lots of words to answer so I hope they get it right. The questions were: Do you have all my papers? Then I put in to help them, Yes or No. The second question was, if Yes, send them all to me because I miss them and need them for show and tell. If their answer is No, I will be so sad and have to start from scratch with a whole new fancy piece of paper from that Queen person. This time though, I will write it and keep it instead of all those government people holding on to it. That way I will know, it isn't lost. I hope they find all of those missing papers. Show and tell will be lot's of fun. I kept a few papers for old times sake to remember with and my supply is at least a couple hundred or so.

Can't wait for my next letter from the people who write on the fancy paper.

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